Thursday, November 30, 2006


Overheard in the office

"... Can I get back to you in a couple of minutes? I just have to crash this server."


Wednesday, November 29, 2006


The guards are just following orders.

Let me set the scene: I'm in the bicycle shed putting my lights, bags, and various other bits of thief bait back on my bicycle for the commute home when the lights go out with a click. It being after 5 pm it is now pitch black.

"Oy, git, put the light back on!"

"Sorry, no can do, I've been told to switch the lights out on my tour", answers the security guard.

"Well, I'm telling you to switch this one back on."

Said guard ponders this. I'd swear you could hear the gears grinding as the concept was processed. 'Click' the light goes back on.

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Tuesday, November 28, 2006


7 scooters and 3 drunks

Overtook 7 scooters on the way home: new record. Which is nice.

(No, it wasn't the same scooter 7 times. It was 7 different scooters!)

Also avoided 3 drunk pedestrians who staggered onto the cycle path on various parts of Jagtvej:

First up, near Tagensvej, was a guy stood in the middle of the cycle path screaming that someone had stolen his pizza. Not so hard to work around as he was just in one position, well not exactly stood, he jumping up and down and screaming about a stolen pizza, but he wasn't moving left/right/forward/backward, so essentially motionless for my purposes.

Next up was at the junction of Nørrebrogade and Jagtvej: a couple of drunks wandering towards me when the junction caught them by surprise causing them to let go of each other. The one on the inside fell into the other pedestrians and a bench, the one on the outside fell into the cyclepath. I pulled up and rolled backwards to avoid him as he was trying to get himself back upright, but he only succeeded in staggering into the traffic. I left him and a car driver arguing about who was on what wrong piece of the road.

And to make my day complete I was waiting at the traffic lights outside a hotel on Falkoner Allé when a chap tried to hold himself up by clutching at a traffic light pole, missed, and fell onto me and then into the gutter. He crawled back onto the pavement, I got a green, and moved on.

Such a small town, so many drunks...

It'll only get worse until after the new year, and it's still only November!


Thursday, November 09, 2006


Ratty has stolen the rat trap

I have some vermin in the udstue. It is a common problem this time of year: the weather turns colder and they come in from the fields. I catch them in some humane traps (little boxes with a trap door) and take them to the woods to let them go.

One of the little blighters has stolen the trap! Have searched all around. It's done gone, disappeared. I shall have to wait until it is lighter to make a full search. It's not as if the trap is small, so feel some trepidation that I may come face to face with the creature ...


Truly bizarre sight

It times like this when you wish you had a camera to hand...

Two chimneys visible from my office window, the smoke from one is going in the opposite direction to the smoke from the other.


Wednesday, November 08, 2006


How did that van get there?

Oh, not another car crash story? Sorry, but yes.

Roundabout at Høje Taastrup is the place in question. It is where two dual carriage ways cross each other. The roundabout is a sort of dome shape, covered in bushes, about 4 meters tall in the middle, obviously three spiral lanes around it. And traffic lights. (Yeah, I didn't get the traffic lights and spiral lanes when I first saw it, but then I saw the traffic using it...)

Many Danish drivers don't 'get' roundabouts in a deep and meaningful way. To be fair there are precious few roundabouts, so most drivers are just not exposed to them that often. This particular one is a 5 minute education in how many ways one can do a roundabout badly. It scares me to death on a regular basis (I've actually seen the traffic light I'm waiting at crushed by a lorry that couldn't work out what was road, what was cyclepath, and what was pavement), and many cyclist don't do it as marked as, well, they don't feel safe either. But I digress.

Saw a van with "accident tape" around it about 3/4 of the way up the roundabout. Shone my lights on it as first impression was WTF, which only made the scene more strange as there didn't appear to be any smashed bushes indicating the path to where it came to rest.

The conclusion I inevitably came to using Occams Rasor (i.e. discounting it being dropped there by a helicopter), was the van had approached from the other side of the roundabout at speed, somehow gone airborne, and landed on my side thereby avoiding smashing any of the bushes I could see.

I shall investigate by doing a full circuit of the roundabout tonight, as long as there isn't too much traffic, one shouldn't tempt the fates after all.

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A missing towel reappears

A towel of mine that went missing from the drier at the clients has reappeared after about 3 months; shrunk and dyed pink. Jamen dog.

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Fixy on the road

Saw a fixed wheel track bicycle on the cyclepath during my commute home last night. No brakes. No lights. No reflectors. No clips.

Insane, but it made me laugh. He was only a youngster. They always are...

I guess Darwin takes them out before they get to grow old.



Agressive free newspaper vendors in Copenhagen

The latest menace to plague cyclists in København are the free newspaper vendors. These guys do not appear to have any conception of how dangerous they are. The regular one I have learned to watch out for stands in front of a shopping centre on Falkoner Allé, blocks the view of a zebra crossing further on and narrows the cycle path by standing in it with his arm outstreched profering a newspaper. (Must say that he now rapidly removes his arm when he sees it is me approaching.) Not so bad as I can't go so fast there as the road is already narrow and there is a bus stop, traffic lights and a couple of zebra crossings, not to forget to mention the crazies that stop and start off from the shopping centre itself without looking or signalling or a brain.

Anyways, back to this morning rant: there I am, it is starting to rain, and I'm blasting down Jagtvej, fighting my way past the squirrels etc., and then a free newspaper vendor jumps out from behind a tree right in front of me offering a free newspaper. Freaking lunatic. Had to drop onto the road proper to avoid an accident.


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